Lets go!

Hello my lovely followers and welcome to my ‘coming out’ blog, finally feeling freed from the mists of the past and ready to begin again trusting the magic of life in all its phases. Its been so long since I have wanted to blog as my outer adventures were overtaken by a need to go within and discover the negativity that had taken root in my subconscious, chaining not only my ability to write but my trust and enthusiasm for life itself.

So many things have been impacting this woman in the intervening years; years where the universe ripped the scales from my eyes and forced me to really look, not only at those I had surrounded myself with, but the negativity and self-debasement dwelling within the shadows of my mind. For that reason I am eternally grateful for each experience, good and not so good; every person who stood by me or betrayed me. Each of you have helped me to grow into who I always was, yet refused to live it! There have been many shocks delivered by those who mattered most but, you what? They, more than they know or indeed meant to do, have forged my strength that had until then gone unacknowledged. Finally I feel freed from my own self-sabotaging ways and ready to stand in the light, unashamed of who I am or how I have lived. If nothing else, each of those experiences and the truths they mirrored back to me, has aided my acceptance of who I am without the need of others’ approval.

This is not to say I value my true family of friends, made up of loving hearts and gentle acceptance of who I am… warts and all, as they say. You are my rock and I could not have reached so deeply into my shadow self and learn to love the parts of me that seemed so unacceptable to those I should never have allowed to sway my sense of self. I will be forever grateful for your compassion and patience with a soul drowning in the harsh judgements of a society that values only what, or who, they can use rather than what is worthy just because it is <3

So in summary, though I was not ready to open to this medium during the process of becoming … which is truly what was happening for me….I have not been idle. I could not have blogged while deep-diving into my depths. Only those most trusted were allowed to see my turmoil and pain. Yes, I felt unworthy and ashamed of being less than perfect, holding myself up to an impossible standard. All part of my past of course. It was an overdue cleansing of that which was never mine to carry. None of us can please everyone of course. It took me a long time to realise this. I hope your journey to wholeness through self-acceptance, if you are still travelling it, is less convoluted lol….though the gifting of wisdom and gentle confidence has been worth every single painful … and joyous …. experience. I would not have grown and remembered who I was without them. If these words do nothing else, I hope they remind you that every one of you are precious beyond measure… each a vital part of the whole. Your presence here helps to give my life purpose; also those who come for a consultation give meaning to all I have experienced, a way to honour those things that cut so deep. I hope in return, they are a light that illuminates your way forward. Thereby we each walk the other ‘home’ to our truest versions of ourselves, wrapped in the knowledge we are enough.

So today is my ‘coming out’, my re-emergence, standing unashamedly in the light. Not perfect by any means but wonderfully human and ready to share my adventures when I have them lol.. and my musings to all who may be wanting to take part. I shall endeavour to pop in weekly to catch you up when I am traveling… could be a little longer if I am not so mobile lol. Brightest blessings to you all and may your journey be lit by the light that dwells within, as we traverse this journey called life together.

Sandy <3